Here's a story for you!

OMG OMG OMG...I wasn't sure I was going to be able to get this written tonight after the last dance. I can't believe Rick ran his hands up her arm pits. The thought makes me cringe. Doesn't he know I HATE arm pits! Lucky for you, I was able to pull it together and plug on.

So after the first 2 dances I was excited about story night....then it turned lame and I realized it wasn't going to end happily ever after.

For having cancer and surgeries in her neck, or where ever, I was really impressed with Baby. You could tell it was hard for her to get through the twirly things, and seriously..could you do it?

Flo's dance was sweet until it was geriatric porn and she kissed Corky. Come on ABC work with me, I don't want to see that stuff. Sexy abs, YES...Not Sexy kissing, NO! Thank you!

What's going to happen when The Hills has to dance to something fast and catchy? She only does those long slow dances and I'm not sure she has the moves to step it up.

The message behind Cho's dance seemed awesome but I didn't see her dance. I mean, I was watching the show, but I couldn't get past the gun belt thing she has on her leg. I was trying to decide if it was a tattoo or a prop. Either way it was RANDOM!!!

Thank goodness The Situations dance was futuristic cuz he danced like a robot. Plus, you know how I feel about mesh on the men. It kills me!

Could you imagine training with Brandy and Maks...it would be like welcome to Snatchville where everyone acts like an a-hole. What's with those two?

Weekly dirty thought...I will be Kurt Warner's naughty little princess any day.

Dear Bristol, I don't think you would ever give a homeless person a second glance. Your dance was unbelievable and I would like you to take your whole act and stuff it. Best Regards,

One final rant: All week I have wanted to send hate mail to Michael Bolton for being such a weinie about Bruno telling him he sucked. If Michael was really in that much denial about his suckiness then he should be thanking Bruno for being so honest. That being said...why is he singing in place of Susan Boyle tomorrow night? Really, they couldn't find a less disgruntled singer to bring back?